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<title>F Is For Family (Or Fire) by AValorousChoice, TSTrashCaptain</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23046739">F Is For Family (Or Fire)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AValorousChoice/pseuds/AValorousChoice'>AValorousChoice</a>, <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TSTrashCaptain/pseuds/TSTrashCaptain'>TSTrashCaptain</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Child Neglect, Fire, Fluff, Human AU, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Character Death, Swearing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 16:27:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>962</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23046739</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AValorousChoice/pseuds/AValorousChoice, https://archiveofourown.org/users/TSTrashCaptain/pseuds/TSTrashCaptain</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Being a single parent is hard. Being a kindergarten teacher is hard. Dealing with twins who light things on fire is even harder. When Patton’s boys accidentally cause a fire at school, their teacher Logan is forced to call him in. Will a teacher and the father of tiny arsonists get along?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Logan Sanders/Patton Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>121</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>F Is For Family (Or Fire)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/><p><br/>Logan must have done something truly horrific in a past life to deserve this. Like, murdered a nun or destroyed an orphanage horrific, because why else would any just and reasonable higher power have placed these two demons in his classroom if not to punish him? He sighed and shook his head, pinching the bridge of his nose as he looked over at Roman who was, yet again, standing on top of his desk. “Roman, we have talked about this. You can’t stand on your desk, it isn’t safe.”</p><p>“But Mr. Beeze, I have to be like Rapunzel!” The toddler in question shot Logan big, pleading eyes, but he wasn’t swayed. </p><p>“I’m sure you can be Rapunzel on ground level. Off the desk, Roman.” Logan easily lifted the child and put him on the ground, hiding a smile as Roman pouted. One glance to the other side of the room revealed the other half of the biggest pair of problems he’d ever encountered busily smearing green finger paint all over the walls. “Remus! Paint goes on the paper, not on the walls.”</p><p>“But Mr. Beeze, green is the prettiest color! I just wanted to make your room better.” Remus gave Logan the same pleading expression, with similar results.</p><p>“And I appreciate that sentiment, but finger paint is bad for walls. Why don’t you put the paint on your paper, and we can hang your paintings up on the wall to help decorate the room?” Logan smoothly suggested, already grabbing the wet wipes to clean the enthusiastic toddler’s hands.</p><p>“It’s not as good, but okay.” Remus looked down at the insane mess of greens all over the construction paper in front of him thoughtfully. “Can I have glitter?”</p><p>“Do you promise to only put the glitter on your paper, and nowhere else?” Logan eyed him suspiciously. There had been instances with Remus and glitter before, and he wasn’t about to be fooled twice. </p><p>“I promise.” Remus gave him an innocent gap-toothed smile, but Logan knew better. Those sweet, slightly dirty cheeks hid a demon who ate paste and threw mud pies at the other children at recess. </p><p>“You may have a little green glitter after recess.” That was the best compromise he would give Remus, and the child seemed to know it. </p><p>“Thank you, Mr. Beeze!” Remus beamed as he bounced out of his seat to join the other children lining up for recess. Logan looked down at the disaster that was the child’s desk and resigned himself to yet another late night spent cleaning up a Remus-level mess. </p><p>“Okay, kids! Time for recess.” Logan smiled as he led his class down the hall and out to the playground where he could spend a few minutes of his day chatting with colleagues. </p><p>Roman happily trotted out towards the jungle gym, intent on perfecting his monkey bar skills, when he spotted something on the ground. A closer inspection revealed a small square with a black stripe on the back. Roman knelt down and picked it up, gasping when he realized what he was holding. Matches! He’d seen these on TV, and he always wanted to know how they worked! It took a few fumbling tries before he finally managed to strike one correctly and get a flame, but once he did, oh it was amazing. It was just like he’d seen, and he was so excited about it. “Remus! Come look!”</p><p>Remus left his pile of dirt to come see what Roman had, frowning in confusion at first. “What is that?”</p><p>“Matches! See?” Roman lit one to demonstrate and his twin’s eyes lit up with equal parts curiosity and demented glee. </p><p>“Oh wow! Let me see!” Remus reached out and snatched the matches away, grinning at Roman’s outraged squawk. </p><p>“Hey, those were mine! Give ‘em back.” Roman glared and stomped his foot, but Remus was already darting away, giggling. With recess over, the children were herded back into the classroom, and Remus kept his new treasure in his pocket. </p><p>He may have been little, but he was clever enough to know that Mr. Beeze would absolutely take them away if he saw, and Remus was determined to light at least one before that happened. He waited until Logan was busy with some of the other children before pulling the matches out of his pocket. He fumbled a little, but managed to quietly light one, staring at the flickering flame in fascination. His eyes drifted to the nearby trash can, nearly overflowing with construction paper pieces. <em>Hmmm….what would happen if….?</em></p><p>Logan had just finished helping Josie cut out her paper heart when a loud whoosh and a flare of light caught his attention. He whirled around to see Remus standing above the trash can which was now on <em>fire!</em><br/><br/>“Remus, get away from there! Kids, go back outside, just like we practiced in the fire drill.” </p><p>Logan pulled the fire alarm and made sure all of the children were safely out before going back to his room to grab a fire extinguisher. By the time he got there, the principal, Toby, was already using another one to douse the blaze. There was a pause, the haze from the extinguisher settling between them like fog as the alarm blared loudly. </p><p>“Who. Did. This?” Toby growled through gritted teeth.</p><p>“Who do you think?” Logan snapped, glaring out the window towards the two walking menaces that had invaded his peaceful existence.</p><p>“I am calling the parents, and I want you to talk to their father when he gets here.” Toby didn’t wait for Logan’s nod of acknowledgement before stalking out of the room. Logan looked down at the charred remains of his trash can, at the mess and chaos of his room and sighed deeply.</p><p>“....Well shit.”  </p><p>
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